This year’s centerpiece will be the piece de resistance. But you don’t know why anyone would bother with the trimmings when there’s a feast ahead; doesn’t matter to you if it’s on china or a paper plate. Women think more like the web—everything links to everything. You’ve also to have the right grip and keep your eye on the ball. Then, they take another 20 minutes of genital stimulation to reach orgasm.Candles have already made the shopping list so everything will be perfect. Women like to feel deeply connected before they turn on sexually. It works against us when the task at hand is sex and we can’t let go of the cares of the day. Marshal all these sex tips for a coordinated effort. If you rush her, she’ll conclude it’s not her night and tell you to go ahead.

And you’ve probably been shot down a time or two (or hundred).

The best time to suggest something new is not on the car ride home but after she is very aroused.

At that point her modesty is lower, her inhibition has dropped, and she is the most open to your suggestion.

You can help by not lording it over her in the morning debrief.

Don’t say, “Wow, I knew you’d really like if I could ever talk you into it.” Instead, be reassuring.

Say, “That was fantastic last night.” Leave the details until the next time she’s halfway up the mountain.

For some reason, some women experience shame when their vulnerable experimentation if recounted.

You’d be wise to get her to talk about it only when she’s aroused.

She likes it, she needs it but she only knows that once she’s having it. If you’re a sexual pursuer, you like to improve things.

You probably have fantastic ideas about how to spice sex up.

Her experience in her body is markedly different that your experience.