If we are not together we want to hear their voice and know they are reaching out to us now.In our busy lives we don’t always answer our phones.When they don’t live up to our projected image we become dismissive and begin looking elsewhere.

dating calling texting-54

We suffered from various degrees of neglect, abuse, and abandonment.

In order to get through the dating stage and develop a real relationship, we have to talk about our wounding.

Though the times and technologies have changed, the basics of dating and mating haven’t.

The new science of love demonstrates that there are 5 stages for having a great relationship that lasts through time: Stage 1: Falling In Love Stage 2: Becoming a Couple Stage 3: Disillusionment Stage 4: Creating Real, Lasting Love Stage 5: Finding Your Calling as a Couple All five stages work best when we communicate with all parts of ourselves.

When we talk, we are interacting with a real person in real time.

We are aware of our flaws as we stumble over “saying what we feel.” We can’t consult friends or edit the text before we send it. We can “hear” a smile or a frown more easily listening than reading and the immediacy of back and forth communication helps us be more honest and uncensored.

" so you can imagine my reaction when some random guy I met at a Ratatat concert calls me up to schedule a date. If you have a bad imagination, it's something like this: So unless you've just been arrested for murder and/or I've accidentally become pregnant with your child, we don't have that much to talk about yet, let alone have a conversation in real time. It's more fun and less pressure, and how else can I obsessively go over the conversation accurately with my annoyed friends?

I’ve been a marriage and family counselor for more than 40 years.

(When they were kids, they had to have phone sex over a set of tin cans with a piece of twine connecting them!